Tuesday, April 17, 2012

New right knee & update on our life

A lot has happened with our family since January 2011. Joshua is now in Boys Scouts and in the sixth grade. He is in the IB program at his middle school. Kellie and I were scared for him to be going from a small elementary school to a large middle school. I think we both cried on his first week of school. All has worked out well,though. The school is huge. August, 2011, Robbie, my son, came up from Texas. Kellie, Rob, Joshua, Rafi (Rafi is a little boy that Joshua considers his brother although he is not. Rafi is a boy that we had been taking of since he was around six months old. I remember Rafi could not sit up without assistance when we got him.)and myself traveled to Billings, Montana to finally settle the estate of my children's father and take their father's possessions out of storage. Bob passed away in September, 2006 from a rattlesnake bite either on or near his thumb. It is a long story that I will not go into at this time. Perhaps I never will. Joshua and Kellie went to Scout Camp in June, 2011. Both had a wonderful time. Kellie is an Assistant Scout Leader for our troop here in Colorado Springs. I will probably remember lots of happenings within our family as time goes on, but right now I am really blank.

I had a total knee joint replacement on October 10, 2011 by Dr. Feign. Kellie and Joshua were right there with me every step of the way. Kellie did not leave my side. She kept Joshua out of school that day. I had to be at the hospital around 6-6:30 that morning. They never left the hospital they told me. Even ate their meals at the hospital. We prayed together before surgery. I was so afraid I would not wake after surgery. I cried and Kellie encouraged me saying that she will see me in a couple of hours. Kellie and Joshua were at my bedside when I woke. I was in the hospital three days. Joshua & Kellie came to the hospital every morning before school and in the evenings. My room used to be on the lower level of our home. During those three days in the hospital Kellie moved by bed and some other furniture upstairs to the main level of our home. That was not an easy job. They also went to a local furniture store and bought me a red leather chair so that I would have a chair in my room for visitors & if I wanted to use it myself. The chair looks very nice. Kellie and Joshua would not sleep in their own beds the first week I was home from surgery. Kellie slept on the couch with Joshua sleeping on the loveseat. The second week she had brought Joshua's bed into the office, but she continued to sleep on the couch. She said she needed to be near me in case something happened. The first two weeks I really needed help getting up from the bed and into the bathroom even with the walker. Kellie and I have lived together off and on for years. when she was pregnant with Joshua is when we started living together. so it's been the three of us for a lot of years. We lived together by choice and not out of necessity. Before the surgery the patient is to go to a class letting you what to expect. I went to the first one, then the caretaker goes two weeks later to the second one. Finally I talked them both into going back to their own rooms for some good sleep. Kellie told me to text her phone whenever I needed to get up for the bathroom. I did not want her to come to the main level just to watch me go to the bathroom. So I would text her when I got up with the walker, she would yell to me 'are you okay, Mother? I would always say 'yes, thank you'. When I had needed to be taken care of, whether it was a cold or whatever, Kellie was always there for me. I told her at five weeks after surgery (and physical therapy)I was ready to drive. I took a test spin around the block and I was good to go. Kellie asked me one day if I would like to pick up Joshua from school. She then started telling everyone that her Mom was mobile again and that I had a huge smile on my face as I drove off to school for Joshua. On October 16,2011 I had plastic surgery on my knee because where I had a skin graft from 1985 did not heal properly. Dr. Rane performed a skin flap (that has turned out nicely by the way). Kellie and Joshua were right there at my side for that surgery also. Because that did not heal properly, it was decided that a wound vacuum machine would be needed. I had been going to the wound care clinic three times a week for the nurses to change my dressing. Thank goodness I have been able to drive all that time. I have been without the wound vac since the last week in March, 2012. I was told today that I need only to come once a week. My wound (where the long and curvy scar is)has almost healed completely. I am a strong person and knew I would get through all of this. Sometimes I would feel a bit discouraged, but knew that it would all be over one day. Kellie always wanted to help me get ready for the shower (with a medical stool she bought for me. Also arranged for safety bars be placed in our bathroom.) There were times it would take 20-30 minutes for me to get stuff and myself ready for a shower and finish toweling off. Surgery on my left leg , I thought, would be mid-summer. I wanted it then, because I would have been able to drive Joshua to school and drive myself places. We both thought this surgery would be a piece of cake...just a straight scar on the front of my leg with none of the other stuff involved. Kellie and I were both looking forward to me walking without pain. She said that I would be able to go long hike with them. I didn't not hike with them, but would go on walks through some parts of the Garden of the Gods with Joshua and Kellie. I did not want to slow them down, so on the longer hikes I would not go. She would often tell me that they would walk slow for me. I do not know when surgery on the left leg will be now. I do not have a kneecap in my left leg due to a motorcycle accident in 1985. That's another long story. I had gone through the pain of one knee replacement and knew what was in store for me with a second surgery. Kellie, my beloved daughter, passed away on March 20, 2012, in her sleep somewhere between 3:30 a.m. and 7 a.m. Joshua noticed her light was on at 3:30 a.m. and went into her room. Kellie was sitting up with her hands behind her head watching television. I guess her hands were in that position to cushion her head from the wall. Joshua asked if she was okay. Kellie answered 'yes, I'm okay. Are you okay?' He answered 'yes'. They both said good night and Joshua returned to bed. At 7 a.m. Joshua and I found her in her bed. Police, paramedics, fire engine/ambulance and later the coroner's vehicle along with family and friends, parents and their children (we had a family daycare in our home)were here. The coroner called me later that day saying the cause of her death is unknown. Her heart and internal organs were all normal and healthy. Joshua has told me that he guesses that God wanted her, that it was her time to go. I am now raising Joshua just as Kellie wanted. We spoke about our future from time to time. She was looking forward to a bright future. Kellie was enrolled in Pikes Peak Community College to further her education, to get a couple of degrees so that her son would be proud of her and she would be able to get a great paying job. She had a plan for life that was shortened drastically. She had a college fund that was started for Joshua years ago. Kellie's passing is a great mystery. We miss and love her greatly. Love you, Kellie. Love, xoxo, Your Mumma